Usually, the first meeting, or the first date, resembles a big leap towards the unknown because even if you admire the person from first sight, there is no way to know what will happen during this first meeting.
Will it really be as cool as it sounds? Is his words interesting? What should I say, for example, and what am I not supposed to disclose, so that I do not divulge all my papers? In this article, a relationship expert will help you make this meeting a success through a 4-step rules, which often contributes to deepening the relationship later.
1st Rule: Be on your guard, whatever the circumstances
During the first date, you might be preoccupied with the thought of how to get him to like you, and you might think of several ways to reach that goal. However, the quick and effective way for someone to like you is to act yourself.
Certainly, you have to be in the highest looks, but without changing anything from your essence, the most important thing is to show that you are comfortable by your nature, whether on the physical level (clothes, shape …) or on the psychological level (self-confidence). Self-esteem and your mood allow you to encourage your man to appear himself , which is the biggest gain.
2nd Rule: Be open and show interest
To bring the distance between you closer, something that gradually turns into a deep emotion, do not hesitate to search for recognition of the components of his personality. But be careful of letting him feel as though he is under interrogation, but try to find out his values, the things he loves … Ask the right questions at the right time.
In return, open your chest to him and share with him some details of your life and the things that interest you (find out more in the third rule), in an attempt to identify the things that he is alienated from and things that interest him in the relationship, which helps you build a good relationship and get to know his personality closely.
If he has a distinct hobby, or if he loves music or sports, try to find out the secret of that love, and talk in general even if you are not a specialist in that field.
3rd Rule: Discussion of fixed values
Your values are your perspectives on life, relationship, love, the education of your children, and all the things that build your personality year after year. Here, too, you should not impose your opinion on these values as a precondition for the possibility of building a relationship with him, and do not expect him to accept and stick to all your thoughts.
Conversely, being able to discuss these values and disclose them without arrogance or shame helps you assess the depth of your common interests and differences. It is true that difference enriches the relationship, but deep-rooted differences may pose a risk to the well-being of the relationship in the long run.
Thus, at the first meeting, it is necessary to take time to learn about the values that are most important to both sides
4th Rule: Don’t hurry
Urgency is the enemy of first dates. Today, thanks to the Internet, there are many ways to communicate and date, which make the two parties hurry to build their relationship: two people communicate, talk a little, then decide a date first to see if they are in the appropriate way, and often, the two parties don’t try to go further, farther. From a first date when they expect a lot of each other: persuasion, excitement, admiration … the challenge is heavy.
Waiting to discover the other and open up to him in return, avoids disappointments in relationships that are shorter than expected, and gives you an opportunity to sever your relationship from the beginning with someone who will not be suitable for you. So, take more time at the beginning to save you valuable time by the end.
5th Rule: Don’t show him all your feelings for him
If you love this person to the point of madness, don’t rush to show him what you feel for him, until you are sure of your value to him, and don’t make him feel how important he is to you, because that may make him feel some confusion and fear.
What I mean is not that you are in a state of indifference and ignorance, but the intention here is to give your relationship a chance to develop, and everything will come at its own time, wait until the time to express feelings comes and get closer to each other, and only then can you announce to each other how many feelings there are in the heart Each other.
But it’s necessary at the beginning of the relationship not to disclose the crazy feelings, the excessive degree of love, as this may expose you to this person blocking your attempts to associate with him, as a result of the confusion that you caused.
6th Rule: Listen more than you talk
The person who is listening is a very smart person, as he is credible and makes a good impression on those who speak with him, and it’s a good way to communicate with others and thus shows your personal character, that you are a person characterized by thinking, patience, and caring.
Don’t talk too much, until you give him a great opportunity to express everything that reverberates in his mind, and you shouldn’t impose your opinion on him, as each of us has his own opinions and doesn’t accept that anyone’s opinion is imposed on him, so respecting the opinions of others is nothing but respect for them personally.